I know it's been a long time since I have made an entry, but this time it's not because I am deep in a dark cave. I seem at have emerged through a tree root, and l found myself in deep woods, but at least I can see the light of day.
In the other world-the one we call real life- I'm busierand my 33 year old daughter is about to present me (and her father)with a grandchild! I do not usually write much about Meg because she doesn't want to have her life broadcast into cyberspace, These days my readership is small enough that I feel you are my friends, and want to share the my joy.
She has been talking about having a child for several years now, and has been waiting for a stable environment, a partner, male or female, with whom to have a child. As the years have passed, her frustration level rose to the point of researching artificial insemination. And that is what she did, deciding to raise the child alone-with help from friends and family. We were thrilled-my mother can't wait to meet her great grandchild! I'm a bit impatient, too, considering it's not due til mid June.
And because life is filled with the unexpected, she met a boyfriend, Adam, on some dating service post insemination. She got several calls, and told each one that she was pregnant, and quite capable of taking care of the child and herself. She went out on several dates, and Adam was the last. He lives and works in Rhode Island and they see each other on weekends,
He seems completely unconcerned about how this child's life began, and will roar down from R. I. to be there for her during the birth. She also has a Doula, who will be with her during all the hospital labor and delivery. She is very well organized, with day(and night) care-she works alternating 12 hour shifts - and a detailed birth plan and an interesting nursery all ready. (The nursery is decorated with fire and fairies! This is no surprise to anyone who knows her.)
She has researched early childhood-her college major was human development and family relations, though she works as a plant operator assistant at a nuclear power plant against which I used to protest. She has selected a minimum of "baby things" to fit in her small house, and she is now going to an acupuncturist to turn the baby who is breech at the moment.
She is still working, forced kicking and screaming into light duty, at five months along. She has not missed a whole days work since she became pregnant She is rightly proud of her organization and planning, and is handling getting bigger and bigger very well. She has a great attitude about labor and delivery, and now even has Adam to be by her side.
Poor Meg, she hasn't a clue. This baby will disrupt all her neatly laid plans, will change her life in ways she cannot imagine, will fill her tiny house with equipment and toys, joy and exhaustion. will take over her heart and mind as it has taken over her body, She cannot imagine the ride she embarking on, and all of this is okay.She will struggle and grow along with the child and, luckily, is a strong, independently minded woman who rises to challenges. I cannot imagine where she comes from! Her father and I are slightly bemused about this child we raised.
All the way through this, I have referred to the baby as " the child" or "it" because she decided early not to share the child's gender with anyone. This has driven some friends almost crazy, but she points out this is the only nine months in its whole life that nobody is projecting gender roles on to him or her, and she wants to keep it that way! She thinks about these things.
The fly in the ointment is the baby in breech. If he/she does not turn, she will have to have a C-section, and will be miserable about that until she holds the baby in her arms. Most of all, though, she wants a healthy child. So that is the news in my neck of the woods, and I will let you all know what's going on when we know more!
Blessings, soon-to-be Granny Margo
Thursday, May 25, 2006
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